Why Every Parent Needs a Death Binder (and What to Put in Yours)

I was a teenager when my mom sent me *the email* before she and my stepdad went on a trip without me. Maybe you've gotten *the email* from your parents or other family members - the one that tells you where the life insurance paperwork, wills, and other important documents are in case of an emergency. I remember that distinctly, even though their trip went off without a hitch and they're both still alive and well. This fall, it came full circle when my husband and I went to Morocco for a wedding and left our two young daughters at home in the care of a babysitter. I found myself sending a similar email - though in 2024, it was a text - to my sister and mom, telling them where to find things, just in case.

Whether you've sent that message or not, it's important to consider what information your co-parent, family, or children would need if something happened to you, especially if, like me, you're the one who manages the finances and logistics in your family. As the founder of an estate planning company, I am constantly highlighting the importance of getting wills and power of attorney documents, but getting these legal documents is only the tip of the iceberg in terms of the information your executor or family would need if you passed away or were incapacitated - and they're only helpful if your family knows where to find them. After all, Aretha Franklin's family famously found handwritten wills in the couch cushions a year after she passed away.

What goes inside a death binder?

So what should you put in your 'death binder,' as it's come to be known? The idea is to include any information that would make it easier for your family to close up your life after you pass away. Common items to put in a death binder include:

• Legal documents, primarily a will and power of attorney documents
• Copies of life insurance policies and other insurance policies (home, auto)
• A key contact list that includes any professionals your executor would need to contact - for example, financial advisors, accountants, insurance brokers or key household contacts like lawn maintenance companies or other service providers
• A list of your assets and liabilities - executors often wait for physical mail to come in or review old tax returns to figure out where you have accounts. Make it easy for them and list out where you bank, where you hold investments and where you have any debts (credit cards, mortgages, loans, or lines of credit)
• A list of subscriptions or accounts that would need to be cancelled - think cable, internet, cell phones, Netflix, gym memberships, or other recurring fees
• Passwords to key accounts - I use password manager 1Password, and I've given my spouse access to all of my passwords in the event of an emergency. You can use something similar or just write down key passwords for your executor (as long as you're comfortable with sharing that information)
• Instructions for digital accounts - whether to shut down social media accounts or keep them active or other instructions for your digital footprint
• Funeral and burial wishes - any pre-planned arrangements and other wishes for a celebration of life

Other things you can include

In addition to those documents, professional executor Debbie Stanley from Estate Transition Planners in Ontario highlights a variety of other items that can be extremely helpful for your executor.  Specifically for parents, she recommends storing marriage or cohabitation agreements, separation agreements and/or divorce documents, and child support documents. If you're a pet parent, she also recommends storing details for pets, including vet info, medications, or special requirements. She also recommends storing important health information, including a list of medications and medical contacts, for you and your children.

Your death binder doesn't just have to be about logistics, though. In mine, I've written final social media posts that I would want to be posted after I die since knowing me, my last post would be a photo of pizza. I've also written a letter to my family that I would want shared with them after I pass. A death binder can be as much about your legacy as it is about the brass tacks of closing up your life.

So, where does it go?

In terms of where to store this info, it can be physical - for example an actual binder, a file folder, or a storage box - or it can be digital. For example, I've used my company, online will platform Willful, to create my will, power of attorney documents, funeral wishes, and asset and liability list, and I store those documents and all of my other documents and wishes in a Google Drive folder, and I've given my executor access (though it's important to note that in all provinces except BC, the original copy of your will must be stored as a physical paper copy). Whether you store it physically or digitally, the key is to ensure your executor or key family members have access to the documents.

Stanley says that a death binder can save a lot of time and stress in the future. "A 'death binder' is a true gift for executors, offering clarity during a difficult time. It ensures that all essential information and documents are at their fingertips, reducing stress and providing peace of mind."