Why I've Joined The No-Smartphone Before 14 Movement

Last year, my husband and I made a decision that our kids initially weren't too happy about. We signed a pledge that we wouldn’t be handing any of them a smartphone until at least age 14. Our eldest, at age 10, was already navigating friendships with other kids who had been given devices as early as age nine. She’d be on playdates with friends who were using them to watch endless streams of YouTube videos, play video games, and take selfies instead of hanging out together in the park.

As kids start to get more independence and walk to school or extra-curricular activities without an adult, a lot of parents hand over an old smartphone as an easy way to stay in touch. It doesn’t seem unusual to want to both track and touch base with your kid while they’re out in the world. Half of kids have a smartphone by age 11. But I’ve seen a lot of research that’s made me reconsider the smartphone introduction altogether.

It feels like every week, new research comes out about the impacts of smartphones on the developing brain. Studies related to attention, dopamine and impulse control. But also, research linking smartphones to anxiety, mental health and the risk of self-harm. One recent study suggests that having a smartphone before age 13 is associated with worse mental health outcomes in young adulthood, particularly among girls. Things like diminished self-worth, suicidal thoughts and emotional regulation issues. And it’s not just social media access. It’s also factors like cyberbullying, sleep disruptions and poor family relationships. Not to mention access to violence, graphic sexual content and extreme ideologies.

Many child health experts agree

“The introduction of children to the online environment is the largest unregulated clinical trial we have ever run,” says Dr. Charlotte Hepburn Moore, Medical Director, SickKids Child Health Policy Accelerator. “The results are incredibly concerning. Digital platforms are taking advantage of children’s vulnerabilities, leading to compulsive internet use, diminished self-worth, body dysmorphia and self-harm. Regulating digital platforms—including age restrictions—will keep children safer and healthier online.”

Brain development is an important element to consider when it comes to giving kids a smartphone, agrees Dr. Michele Locke, a clinical psychologist who specializes in child, adolescent and parenting psychology in Toronto, Ont. “For the same reason we wouldn’t give a nine- or ten-year-old keys to a car, is why we wouldn’t give them a phone before they’re ready for it. Everything we do when we are parenting young kids is wiring their brains for their future life. Today, there’s major fragmentation in attention because of access to rapid, quick-paced devices that provide immediate gratification and have made this generation of kids and teens really struggle to stay focused, to delay desire, to want and wait, essentially. It’s not just about harms that can happen on the devices, it’s about what you’re taking away from them in terms of skills they’re going to need as adults.”

Even just a few years ago, I don’t think anyone knew the effects smartphones could have on kids—smartphone use among children and teens is ubiquitous. But attitudes have begun to shift, and parents like me are taking action.

The rise of the smartphone-free movement

Across the world, parents are banding together to delay smartphones and social media access for kids. In the UK, it’s through Smartphone Free Childhood, in the U.S., through Wait Until 8th, in Canada, through Unplugged Canada, and in Australia, WaitMate. (All of this pressure even led to Australia passing a law banning social media for kids under age 16.)

This growing momentum, combined with the popularity of Jonathan Haidt’s book, The Anxious Generation, and the disturbing Netflix show Adolescence, all prompted a lot of conversations amongst the parents in my neighbourhood. There was a real sense of urgency when we realized we couldn’t let this be the norm for our kids and their peers, and it was on us to change that.

One night last winter, a group of local parents and I sat around a dining room table and started to strategize. First, we discovered Unplugged Canada, a non-profit group started in 2024 by Vancouver parent Jenny Perez. Unplugged provided a framework for us to “pledge” to delay smartphones, to build a community of like-minded parents, and take collective action to shift the culture around kids and technology access.

We started spreading the word. We socialized it with other parents at school events, started a text chain about it in the parent group chats, shared about it in the park or on playdates. We got the class reps to send out emails. The school even let us have a table at the end-of-year fun fair. We also used social media to spread the word—and yes, it can be a helpful way to build a community—for adults. We were trying to find any way we could to engage and mobilize more parents because the time was now for our kids. Not everyone signed, but a lot of parents engaged, and it led to lots of fruitful conversations about the challenges of navigating technology with kids.

Why join a movement

What’s been amazing is how the community has rallied together, showing that when parents, schools and neighbourhoods take the pledge together, it can help ease the pressure on kids and parents.

A lot of parents said they were grateful someone started this initiative because they wanted to hold off, but also didn’t want their kid to be left out. Or they’d seen the effects on older siblings, so they were willing to take a different tack with their younger children. Others told us their kids already had one, and to take the smartphone away now would lead to social ostracism.

We quickly got more than 100 pledges at our school and began to mobilize to spread the word at other schools in our neighbourhood. The Unplugged pledge is now active at more than 750 schools across Canada. It made us realize, if we band together about something we’re passionate about, we can effect real change. Whether that’s at the grassroots level, through parent-to-parent interactions, friends, through our school or by engaging like-minded organizations.

Whether the government legislates smartphones and social media for kids, or whether all the parents at our school sign the pledge, it doesn’t matter. It’s shown us all the ways we can change the reality for our kids and their future. Our goal is to make it normal for kids not to have a phone. The kids are even on board now, too. Mine proudly display “Unplugged Kids” buttons on their backpacks and are shockingly proud of my advocacy work.

How kids can stay connected without smartphones

There are lots of ways for kids to stay in touch with both parents and friends:

• The home phone is experiencing a real resurgence. Not only is this useful in an emergency, it’s a great way to teach kids how to actually talk to each other and book their own playdates, even at young ages.

• Smartwatches, like the Garmin Bounce 2, offer kids the opportunity to call and text with parental controls.

• Hand your kid an old-school flip phone so they can communicate via calls and texts just like we used to.

• Opt for a device like the Pinwheel, which offers vetted apps but no social media or browser and lots of parent controls.