Why I'm not a hockey mom!

Maria signs her son up for ball hockey — and witnesses parents who take their kids' sports a little too seriously.

My ball hockey player.

We just signed the kids up for their extracurricular sports activities that will take them through the summer. We’ve got karate, swimming and ball hockey on the agenda this time round.

Extracurricular sports — also known as ‘Why Mommy and Daddy are poor.’

My son just started his first season playing local ball hockey a couple of weeks ago. We signed him up months ago and he’s been talking about it non-stop ever since. He’s not a skater but he’s obsessed with hockey so this is his happy alternative. We decided to go with house league since it’s his first time playing. For those who don’t know, house league is meant to be a “less competitive” option.

The kids understand this, the coaches understand this but I’m not sure the parents do. In fact, I’m pretty sure some of the parents thought we were watching an NHL playoff game. I was “lucky” enough to experience some of these mistaken parents — they were screaming and badmouthing referees and some were even making snide comments about the kids.

It was their FIRST game.

Some of these kids, including mine, have never played before. They are literally just thrown in there and the refs are telling them where to stand and what to do so they can learn to play. It’s supposed to be about the kids being active and having fun and learning about a sport that they all clearly love and enjoy or they wouldn’t be there.

I think some of the parents decided that it was more about their egos.

This was my first go round as a “hockey mom” and I naively assumed we all just cheer the kids on, make sure they’re having fun, encourage team work and a healthy lifestyle.

This hockey mom was naive. This hockey mom went home after game one and poured herself a rather large glass of alcohol. This hockey mom sent hockey dad to game two.

Not a hockey mom. Not an understatement.