Are Your Kids Facing Lunchbox Shaming?

Every time CBC News Network host Marianne Dimain looks at a Siopao, she remembers the day she brought the Filipino snack to elementary school. Dimain says her grade four self felt a mix of emotions. “Everyone was like, ‘what is that?’” she says. Feeling embarrassed, Dimain chucked the Siopao across the playground. The steamed bun rolled away and Dimain was left with layers of guilt. “Even though I wanted to eat it and I was hungry, I pretended to agree with them,” says Dimain. “I was so embarrassed that I was like, ‘I know it's weird.’”

For many kids across Canada, this experience can feel familiar. According to a 2024 survey by Sistema and Angus Reid, over one in four Canadian parents report their child has been ridiculed or bullied based on the food they bring to school—also known as lunchbox shaming. As parents and caregivers navigating this, it’s important to understand that what happens at lunchtime can significantly impact children's well-being, self-esteem and cultural identity.

What is lunchbox shaming?

Kids are notorious for having strong opinions. But lunchbox shaming goes beyond just disliking a food. It’s when a child is criticized, made fun of or excluded because of the foods they bring to school. This type of shaming often targets foods that reflect a family's cultural background, traditions, or socio-economic status. According to Sistema and Angus Reid, parents reported their children experienced lunchbox shaming because of the appearance, the smell and the lack of familiarity with the food.

Why lunchbox shaming cuts deeper than you think

School lunch is more than just a nutritious meal to keep kids energized throughout the day. Janet Nezon, founder of food literacy organization Rainbow Plate, says it’s a connection back to home. “When a child opens that lunch, they sort of get this feeling of their parent being there,” says Nezon. “But in other ways, you know, for all ages, lunch is a reflection of families, culture and history, traditions and social norms.”

That’s why when a child experiences lunchbox shaming, it can significantly impact their well-being. At first, they may feel upset, embarrassed, ashamed or even isolated from their peers. Over time, these feelings can undermine a child’s sense of self. According to the survey by Sistema and Angus Reid, 77 percent of parents agreed that lunchbox shaming can have a long-term negative impact on children and their cultural identity.

“[Lunchbox shaming] can marginalize people, and this form of discrimination at a developmental age is very detrimental to the child's self-esteem and identity,” says Dr. Ratna Ghosh, a Distinguished James McGill Professor Emerita in Education. “It could start with lunchbox shaming, but it could turn into racism and different kinds of bullying."

Who gets shamed the most—and why it matters

According to Sistema and Angus Reid, over one in four Canadian children experience lunchbox shaming. The survey also shows that this type of bullying disproportionately impacts racialized communities. Canadian parents from Black (42 percent), Southeast Asian (42 percent), Latin American (36 percent) and South Asian (33 percent) communities were twice as likely to say that their child had experienced lunchbox shaming as White parents (17 percent).

Rice dishes, curries, stewed meats or vegetables and fish dishes were amongst the foods commonly shamed, according to the survey. This data is an example of how lunchbox shaming often correlates with a child’s cultural background or ethnicity.

Jenny Lo, a parent and a kindergarten teacher in Toronto, also finds that lunchbox shaming relates to socio-economic status and not having enough in their lunch bag. “Sometimes when I notice that, I will give [students] a bit more from the snack program…so they feel like they’re being looked after.”

How parents are responding and what it means for kids

According to Sistema and Angus Reid, 46 percent of children who experienced lunchbox shaming asked their parents to change their lunches. Dimain remembers the time she “begged” her parents to pack her something else for lunch. “I had this guilt, immediate guilt,” she says. “They finally agreed to spend their hard-earned money to buy me Lunchables that I wanted to eat because I wanted to be like everyone else.”

In the same survey, more than a quarter of parents responded by trying to pack more "traditional North American" foods. Feeling the pressure to conform or hiding cultural foods can lead children to miss an important meal during the day, which Nezon says has significant consequences. “Children who are not eating the lunches sent from home or not eating all of them are likely hungry during the day, which makes them challenged when it comes to things like participating in school activities and even learning,” she says.

What parents can do to address lunchbox shaming

Talk to your child

Be sure to encourage open communication about your child’s school day and feelings, especially around lunchtime. Nezon advises parents to look out for signs of lunchbox shaming, such as half-eaten lunches or noticeable changes in their child’s mood. Validate their emotions and let them know it's okay to feel upset or embarrassed, and reiterate that the problem is not them or their lunch.

Educate and empower

Teach your child about food diversity and the importance of respecting different cultures and traditions. Dr. Ghosh adds that parents should also teach their children to be proud of their own cultural backgrounds. “If they instill in their children the pride of their own culture, that I think is the most important,” she says. “Parents must teach them self-esteem and self-confidence.”

Helping your child build this inner strength can also mean developing healthy responses to negative comments. Simple phrases such as "I like my lunch" and "This is food from my culture,” are a few examples. This can prepare them to respectfully stand up for themselves in future situations.

Use resources and get support

If you’re looking for more tips, Sistema and Rainbow Plate have co-created downloadable resources that can help parents facilitate conversations about lunch inclusivity at home. Be sure to also reach out to teachers or administrators to make them aware of the issue and seek their support.

What schools and teachers can do to stop lunchbox shaming

Educators can play an important role in preventing bullying. When it comes to lunchbox shaming, the Sistema and Angus Reid survey says 80 percent of parents agreed that schools and teachers should be more active in prevention.

Dr. Ghosh says teaching the values of multiculturalism, such as equity and acceptance, can help with this. “Many times aggressive behaviour in schools goes unnoticed or ignored by both teachers and administrators,” says Dr. Ghosh. “Discussing norms and policies can have a very powerful effect on reducing the aggression of students.”

Here are ways educators can help prevent lunchbox shaming in the classroom:

Creating an inclusive environment

Nezon says that educators are at the “frontline” of building a positive atmosphere during lunchtime. “It's about creating a specific culture around food and around lunches, and leading with this expectation that all food is good food. All food is accepted,” she says. “Children will eat when they feel safe and comfortable, and we know that's a lot to do with the environment.”

Incorporating food diversity

Schools can also integrate food diversity and cultural sensitivity into classroom lessons. For example, Lo says her classroom implemented a “multicultural month” where parents were invited to make presentations about their cultural background to the class. “It gives [kids] an idea that, ‘oh, yeah, whatever I have in my lunchbox might be different compared to what other people are eating,’” she says.

Accessing resources

There are several resources available to help educators navigate the conversation around food and lunchbox shaming. For example, Sistema and Rainbow Plate have co-created downloadable materials specifically for teachers to help them facilitate age-appropriate conversations and address shaming in the moment. Nezon adds that these resources are all about encouraging educators to approach the topic of food with curiosity. “Food is this incredibly rich medium that we can take and use to engage children in the entire world around them,” she says.

Ways to celebrate food pride

All children have a right to enjoy their school lunch free from bullying. Creating a supportive lunchtime environment starts with educating children to be accepting of foods and traditions from all cultures. “We're always trying to teach them to be inclusive in [my] class. In the classroom, everybody is different and unique,” says Lo.

Just in time for back to school, September 19th marks Love Your Lunch Day, an initiative to raise awareness and start conversations about food diversity and inclusivity.

Schools can celebrate the day by encouraging kids to bring their favourite foods to school and host a ‘show and share’ with classmates to tell the stories behind them. “[It’s about] helping children to really appreciate…the history and the people behind the foods that the family is eating and to feel proud of that,” says Nezon.

The bottom line

Both educators and parents can work together to ensure lunchtime is a positive and inclusive experience for all children. For example, as a parent herself, Dimain encourages her kids to be curious about different foods, without being judgmental. “I think it's just teaching kids that they need to have tolerance and acceptance and curiosity without judgment,” she says.

Ultimately, the goal is to create school environments where everyone can feel proud and confident eating the foods they love, regardless of their background. “It’s so much more than just the food,” says Dimain. “It's about your culture and being proud of your culture, and that food is part of who you are.”

Experts

• Dr. Ratna Ghosh is a Distinguished James McGill Professor and William C. Macdonald Professor of Education at McGill University.
• Janet Nezon is the founder of Rainbow Plate, an organization dedicated to promoting food literacy and inclusivity among children.