Meet My Son Andrew, Autism Self-Advocate

I often write about my autistic son Andrew, and I cannot think of a better way to close off 2024 than by interviewing him. Andrew is a well-known Canadian autism advocate who always sees the best in people. He has experienced terrifying lows, with non-stop compulsive rituals and frightening, violent meltdowns due to emotional and sensory overload, to wonderful highs that bring me joy, pride and awe. Despite significant challenges, he embraces life head-on with grit, determination, perseverance and optimism. As he says, "Every day I try to be the best person, not the best autistic person." 

Q: Andrew, tell me about yourself.

I am 37 years old, I live in Toronto and I am autistic. I also have Tourette Syndrome, OCD, ADHD, developmental disabilities and learning disabilities. I’m hard to miss because I am 6’4” tall!  I have faced many challenges in my life, but I don’t let them get me down. I work hard on them, but I know I have a lot of strengths. I love my job in IT with Rogers Communications, one of Canada’s leading telecommunications companies, living in my condo and socializing. I love life.

Q: Tell me about your autism.

When people meet me, they often know I’m autistic. The other day, my mom and I were checking out at the grocery store, and the cashier looked at me and said, “I have a son in care.”  She knew right away!  I can’t maintain eye contact, and I don’t understand metaphors and abstract concepts. I am really literal. I stim at times, massaging my shoulders and rubbing the top of my head in circles, which helps keep me calm. I have a speech impediment, but I don’t mind repeating what I say when others don’t understand me. I also only eat smooth foods and don’t like anything with texture, like cottage cheese. And I won’t eat vegetables. 

Unlike many autistic people, however, I am very social and love meeting and talking with other people. I talk to everyone on the subway and in elevators, which my sister hates but has helped me make new friends. It can be confusing because I don’t always understand what people say, and sometimes they say things they don’t mean. One co-worker told me, “Good to see you, Andrew. Let’s have lunch one day.”  I started calling her every day for lunch until my mom explained that people sometimes say that just to be friendly but may not really mean they want to have lunch. I also talk and eat way too fast, speak very loudly and interrupt others. I don’t mean to, but I get excited.

Q: What do you want people to know about autism?

I want people to know that every autistic person is different. We all have our own strengths and weaknesses, just like neurotypical people. My strengths include my friendliness, my kindness, my social and communication abilities and my caring for others. And I’m really good at IT. But I need support in many areas of my life to help me, including my impulsivity, anxiety and OCD. I don’t understand money. I also have to watch my tendency to over-communicate with people. It’s not easy for me to pick up on people’s signals and social cues.

Q: What do you like to do outside work?

Ever since I was six years old, I’ve loved baseball. Growing up, I played for our local baseball league as a catcher. I also became an umpire, and now I love watching baseball and cheering for the Toronto Blue Jays. My Dad, boss and I go to many games each summer, and I’ve gotten to know many of the players, referees and umpires. I also love video and graphic design, and my family and friends love the videos I create about our lives together. I exercise in the gym almost every day. And I am a huge fan of first responders, especially the police. My last job was with the Toronto Police, where I was the first autistic employee. I was a clerk in Parking Enforcement. I became close to many of the police officers and still am good friends with them today. In addition, I adore cuddling and getting licked by my sister’s dog Emmie Mae. Finally, I love to laugh and tell jokes.

Q: What advice would you give other autistic people?

Do your best and know that being different doesn’t mean that you are less of a person. Focus on your strengths and look at life with determination and happiness, like I do. My autism doesn’t define me but is a core part of who I am, and that’s OK!  I know I am special, not because I’m autistic but because of my kindness and caring.

Q: What advice would you give parents and caregivers of autistic children?

Love your child and let them know you are on their side and will help them in any way you can. My mom is my Warrior Mom. She has always advocated for me at school, with my doctors, at work, and with anyone else I need. She never gives up. She lets me know how proud she is of me and that I am a good person. 

Thank you, Andrew. From all of us in the Stewart family, our warmest wishes for a wonderful holiday season and a healthy, happy 2025!