All I Want for Christmas Is A Few Fun Memories With My Kids
And, as well all know, this is actually a big ask.
A pair of stylish gold hoop earrings, a new cross-body bag, and a cozy new tracksuit are a few of the gifts I’m hoping to receive this year. Also on my list: time with my daughters. And I mean real time with them—not hours spent shuttling them to extra-curriculars, pouring over homework or scarfing down Taco Tuesday around the dinner table. Not that these day-to-day moments can’t be memorable or meaningful or fun. (Who doesn’t enjoy Taco Tuesday, after all?) But I’m craving the stuff of core memories. The times that we can all look back on fondly someday when we think of the holidays. Unfortunately, this particular present is not so easy for my husband to cross off his shopping list, or to tie with a bow. In fact, it’s a gift that I realized I have to give myself.
When my daughters were very young, the holidays seemed to be all about me buying and wrapping gifts, while also killing myself with baking cookies and planning festive meals. It was a lot of me doing things for them, which, don’t get me wrong, I loved on a certain level. But now that they are getting a bit older, I’m looking for more ways to do the holidays with them. So, in the spirit of focusing on presence over presents (a concept I expound every December, but never quite seem to nail), we’re starting our memory-making journey with a very special overnight getaway.
Last weekend, we checked in for 24 hours of mother-daughter bonding time at The Royal Hotel in Picton, Ontario, just a few hours from Toronto. We ate candy in bed under the big fluffy duvet, watched holiday movies in our hotel bath robes, and giggled until our sides hurt. We ventured out to the pottery studio across the street for a painting session, did some holiday shopping in the quaint stores along Main Street, and even visited a nearby alpaca farm. It was, in a word, wonderful.
It’s a privilege to be able to get away with my girls for a night, and I’m grateful for it. But it’s not all I’m doing with my daughters this season. In fact, it’s just the beginning. Here are a few more ways I’m leaning into enjoying the holidays with my kids.
Trying new holiday recipes (and practicing old favourites!)
Now that I have a young teen who likes to bake, it’s a golden opportunity to transform chore of holiday baking into a joyful bonding experience. I’m aiming to make holiday baking fun again by trying some new recipes chosen by the kids and doing it together.
Focusing on giving
In past years, we’ve driven around the neighbourhood picking up donations for the food bank and made care packages for women’s shelters. I’ve always gotten them involved, but this year I would like my kids to choose which of our favourite charities to contribute to and how we do it.
Turning gift wrapping into family time
I will still need to hide away to wrap a few of their surprises, of course, but this year, I’m turning the chore of wrapping into a bonding experience. We’ll drink hot chocolates, throw on a holiday playlist and have a little fun while filling the boxes and bags. It will be cute to see how the kids wrap some of each other’s gifts.
Organizing a holiday game night
Over the years, we’ve collected some holiday versions of tried-and-true board games, including bingo and “What Am I?” I wonder which games the kids will choose when they’re in charge of holiday family game night?
As we checked out of our room at The Royal last weekend, the girls and I joined general manager Sol Korngold in the café for hot chocolates and espressos, respectively. Beyond wanting to know how we enjoyed the hotel, and if we had any feedback on our room (it was perfect: no notes), he was quick to tell me how much he liked that we had arranged a just-because mother-daughter holiday sleepover. “Enjoy these times—they’ll be gone before you know it,” he said. The subtext: I’ll blink, and my babies will be adults who won’t have time for mother-daughter sleepovers anymore. I get it.
As parents, we hear a lot of “the days are long, but the years are short” adages. This can be annoying when you’re in the trenches of parenting, but it’s irritatingly true—the years with littles are most definitely numbered, and during the holidays, the days can feel especially, painfully long. Between the parties, the baking, the gifts, and the elf, it can be exhausting. Often, it’s tough to remember to stop and actually enjoy it. But this year, damn it, I’m going to try.
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Karen Robock is a writer, editor and mom of two whose work has appeared in dozens of publications in Canada and the U.S., including Prevention, Reader’s Digest, Canadian Living, and The Toronto Star. Once upon a time, Karen was even the managing editor of Today’s Parent. She lives in Toronto with her husband, school-age daughters, and their two dogs.