Peter says: Vacation guilt

It is important to take vacations when your kids are young - but they do not need to be expensive. A vacation means the pressure is off - there is time to play games, build sandcastles (Or make a kid into a mermaid by burying her lower half and shaping the sand into a tail!) read (naptime!), swim, roast marshmallows around a campfire...so often the kids get what energy we adults have 'left-over'. Taking vacation is a time to enjoy them.

Camping is great, some state/provincial parks have cabins (with *beds*, even) and renting a cottage can usually be done for far less than international travel.

It is great to have kids who are bushed at the end of the day, tuck them in after a quick swim to clean off, and have an opportunity for adult alone-time with no distractions of housework, laundry or extra work brought home.

Our kids range in age from 17 to 10, and we have never done an 'international' trip with all of them. We went to Disney when they were 5-12 y/o, and that was perfect...our eldest joined me on a mission trip to El Salvador last year, and we are headed on an RV adventure this year - three weeks to and from the east coast. Next year we head west. We would never go into debt/credit to travel.

The kids have their whole lives to travel...we just want to whet their appetites for it. It gives them something to work towards!

Funnily, what Peter *neglected* to say is that we really don't go on vacation. I've been known to tag along on his business trips (two, three nights) but we haven't really been away together (without work) since our honeymoon. Not that I'm complaining. Or maybe I am? ;)

I'm looking forward to taking the girls away, but I think I'm with Peter on this one. I agree that even if the kids don't remember the trip it would be a good experience, but, like Allison, I don't want to bother travelling with diapers and other baby gear. I'm also so excited to do the "princess-y" things at Disney (for example) that I definitely want the girls to be at least as excited as me. :)

lisa

We waited to travel internationally until our girls were 3 and 6 - it was my decision as I never wanted to bother with diapers and bottles when traveling. We stayed at a family-friendly resort in Cuba and it has been the best family time in the girls' memories and they'll remember it due to videos, pictures and momentos. We've also gone on at least 5 camping trips in Western Canada each summer, so they are very experienced campers and pine for camping season all winter. You need to go with what you're comfortable with, but you should know that it's only an ordeal if you help make it that way.

I think the earlier you start travelling with babies, the better they are at it. Vacations for us used to be with other couples with no kids, well now we can still travel, we just travel with other couples who also have kids, and we can still have our fun. At the airport, one takes charge of the kids and one takes charge of the check in (usually the hubs because I have no patience for that). It's all about give and take - and as long as that is understood I think travelling with kids at any age is a great idea!

My husband thought the same thing until he finally agreed to take our two girls last year to Mexico (ages 2 and 4). We found a great resort that had lots for them to do and give us much needed alone time for a couple of hours or more each day. To see our youngest daughters excitement for the beach and all the sights and sounds made all the hassle and stress in the world worth it! Yes, it wasn't as relaxing as an adult vacation would have been but to be honest, we tried an adult vacation when our first daughter was just under a year and I pined away for her and wished we brought her when I saw other families. It is now two years later and both girls still talk so fondly of their trip to Mexico and the airplane ride. I have traveled a lot before being a parent too and I still love going through customs and the whole ordeal of travel. As long as you keep a positive frame of mind about the whole thing it is more of a bonding experience and exposing them to new ideas about the world we live in, etc. They may not remember all the details, that is why we take pictures and make sure to relive the stories with them as they grow. We just did our first long road trip to Florida this year with them and they loved it!

I fully agree! Although ours already went overseas last year (we have family there and she still flew free which is why we took her) it was NOT a relaxing vacation by any means. Trying to plan your day around a toddlers schedule is hard and restricts what we could do with her. Our next vacation isn't going to be until shes 5, at which point Disney World here we come. We know its going to be an expensive trip so this way we can save up for it and be able to splurge and stay inside Disney at a local resort and not have to worry about penny pinching. This isn't to say we won't do local staycations which can also be a blast but no more travelling with a toddler. been there, done that ...NEVER going to do it again (and i would like to point out that Ava was a start traveller...sleeping through the night on the 7 hour flight and not crying once through either trip (which our seat mates were grateful for)

Totally disagree! Your kids won't remember really any of their early childhood, so does that mean you shouldn't take them to the park for the day or go to the museum? Yes, i know, these things don't cost heaps of money and investment of time and effort, but they are experiences that shape them-just like travel. My kids and I visited St. Martin this past Febuary (we've also concored Europe and cruise ships) and this last trip they were 1 and 3. Could there be a more difficult age set to travel with? One napped, the other did not. One wanted to sit and make sand castles all day, one just wanted to run the length of the beach. It was not easy, but neither would a week at home, stuck in the house most of the frigid day. So although traveling is a great amount of effort, it is a wonderful experience that shapes character and exposes kids to a vast array of wonders. It provides so many opportunities to see and discuss things that would otherwise go unexplored. I am reminded of this, months after returning from a trip, when grocery shopping and my son spots a coconut and says " mom, look at the coconut -remember when we saw those growing in St. Martin and we had that coconut ice cream on the beach-that was so yummy" . This is what makes it worth the effort. I just try to erase the moments when they whined on the plane for hours on end, or took off in the airport terminal and try to keep in mind that my vacations with them as older children will then seem like a cake walk :)

"If my kid is too young to remember the vacation, why spend the money to take them along?"

I'm not a big traveller, but I think there's an obvious answer to the question you posed above: It's not about remembering. My mom complains that I don't remember any of the things she brought me to as a kid -- concerts, the ballet, etc. -- but that does that mean she shouldn't have bothered? Maybe that's why I'm so into music and performance. Fact is, your kids are unlikely to remember ANYTHING from before they are five, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't do fun things with them, right? And yeah, vacations are super expensive, but think of the memories you'll create for yourself, even if the kids don't remember.