Peter says: Are your kids jealous of each other?
Peter thinks there's a bit of sibling rivalry going on at home, and wonders if there's envy between your kids.
A quiet moment before Peyton grabbed the book Addy was reading to her.
It seems that my two sweet angels are now both old enough to experience all of life's wonderful emotions and deadly sins — the newest being jealousy and envy.
It all started the day Peyton was born.
Kidding. Up until this point there hasn't been much jealousy between the kids — when Peyton arrived and Addy realized we were keeping the pink pooping bundle, she's loved her even more than she loves Belle and Baby Celeste. But as Peyton's grown up (and we've discovered that no two siblings truly are the same), the two besties have had their share of jealous streaks.
The latest started when we took Addy to kindergarten night and enrolled her in soccer. You can look at Peyton and actually hear her snarling, "It's all about Addy. Addy, Addy, Addy."
Then last week we took Addy to see Beauty and the Beast on stage. Peyton stayed with Bubby. When the three of us left, Peyton seemed anything but impressed. That ended up being the first night of Peyton's meltdowns. But this whole jealously thing isn't one-sided: Addy, who has always been a great sharer, has recently decided that she doesn't want Peyton touching any of her things. Period. (We're waiting for her to run around and pee on everything she owns as a territorial warning to Peyton.) Instead of letting Peyton play with something she doesn't want her to touch, Addy will go out of her way to hide items around the house. For example, there was an ice cream cone from their play kitchen under Lisa's pillow this morning. And if Peyton does get a hold of something (and she'll go out of her way to grab whatever it is Addy doesn't want her to touch), Addy will start to scream and cry.
Look, Lisa and I were both kids. We both have siblings. We're no stranger to fighting with our sisters. (As kids and adults.) We don't *purposely* want to upset either of the kids and make them jealous of each other, but it's not easy to make sure both kids are always on equal footing, and, let's be honest, even when they are, they'll always have jealousy issues and sibling rivalries.
So, is your youngest often jealous of your oldest, or vice versa? What are the telltale signs of sibling rivalry in your house?
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Denny says ....
I have 2 girls, ages 3 and 7. There were no jealousy issues when Kaelyn my youngest was born. Avery loved having a baby around and just doted on her. Now that Kaelyn is old enough to grab her things and have a mind of her own, Avery is having a hard time sharing her things (she wants to keep them her things especially because baby sister is not as careful with them as she is). She has also made comments that everyone always pays attention to Kaelyn more. I had to explain to her that she was our only child for 4 years before Kaelyn came around and had us all to herself. Kaelyn has to share mommy & daddy with her so really Kaelyn's getting less attention than she did growing up. I have to help her realize that because Kaelyn is younger she does need more help and attention. Avery also complains that she has to do everything and Kaelyn doesn't help. I explain that being older means she has more responsibility but I also outline the special rewards and activities she gets because she is older (going out to the movies, sleepovers, etc.). It's hard to keep it completely even. I try to remind myself of the attention Avery got when she was an only child and have to remind myself to do the same for Kaelyn all the while keeping Avery's perceptions in mind. I spread my love as evenly as I can with my girls and hopefully when they grow up and look back, what they will remember is not that one got more attention than the other but that their mom and dad loved them a lot.
Anchel Krishna says ....
We only have one kid, but Syona def. gets jealous when attention is paid to anyone else around her. Super fun. Super duper fun...
Your Name G.G. (not verified) says ....
Your Comment
Now you need to take Peyton somewhere without Addyson so she feels special and Addyson knows what it is like being the one to stay behind .... mostly it is easier to do things with both of them together as it is less stressful for both of you (if you are lucky)...
bisioluyole@rocketmail.com (not verified) says ....
I THINK ITS NORMAL OF KIDS TO GET ENVIOUS OF EACH OTHERS ON OCCASIONS. I DO EXPERIENCE THE-SAME , BUT AM NOT REALLY BOTHERED , BUT MY WIFE DO.
AS THEY GROW THINGS GET NORMALIZED AND THEY GET TO NOW WHOSE MORE MATURE , THOUGH, MY FEMALE CHILD DO TOLERATE HIS SISTER IN MOST CASES , COS WE MAKE HIM REALIZED HE SHOULD LEARN TO TOLERATE HIS SISTER .