Reading baby's cues

“The more you observe and care for your baby, the easier it will be to tell.”

Teresa Pitman,

Originally published in Today's Parent July 2005

Send
Share

My friend Mary, expecting her first baby, is “practising” with Candice’s six week-old son, Liam. She carries him around on her shoulder, and when he starts to fuss she rocks him back and forth the way she has seen Candice soothe him.

But it doesn’t work. Liam’s still crying and squirming. Looking forlorn, Mary brings him back to his mother. “I don’t know why he’s crying,” she confesses. Candice knows. “He always acts like that when his diapers are wet,” she says confidently. “He hates having wet diapers.”

She’s right. A quick change, and Liam’s content again. Mary isn’t though. “How did Candice know?” she says, worriedly. “How will I be able to figure out what my baby is trying to tell me? Is there a course or something you can take?”

Greg Moran, professor of clinical and developmental psychology at the University of Western Ontario, tells worried new parents like Mary, “Relax. You’ll know. Our biology has taken care of it. The research repeatedly and compellingly tells us that parents are quite naturally inclined to notice the baby’s signals and figure them out.”

For most parents, he adds, learning to read your baby’s signals isn’t something you have to do deliberately. By simply enjoying your baby, spending lots of time together and being focused on your baby, those cries and signals will start to make sense to you faster than you expected.

He acknowledges that it’s mostly trial and error in the beginning. Your baby fusses, you pick her up and she keeps on crying. You offer your breast, but she turns away, still unhappy. So you sit down to rock her for a few minutes in the rocking chair. She nuzzles into your shoulder and falls asleep. Aha! She was tired. Next time she fusses that way, you’ll know what to try.

Subscribe to Today's Parent for just $14.95* That's only $1.25 an issue!